JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
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