Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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