Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize