We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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