We're like a lot better than the average bears
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Randomize
