ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
