oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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