so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
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A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
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You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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