we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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