My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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