omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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