Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I think people are normalizing furries
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize