he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize