Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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