Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
