found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Randomize