but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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