I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
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To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
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The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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