the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
This house was built for laser tag.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
