Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
