there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
