Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
