even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize