alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
