I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
