yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
