And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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