My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
