You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
