And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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