Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
