Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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