I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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