Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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