it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
