My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
