I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Randomize
