"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You're like the curious george of whores
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
