all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
where are you?
Hypothermia
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yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
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You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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