dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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