hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
