I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
