From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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