The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Please, let me fuck your mom
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
