So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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