if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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