I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
