So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize