Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
The convent might be a nice break from real life
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
