Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
